Beetlejuice - Creepy Old Guy Lyrics

2019 Broadway
Beetlejuice the Musical - Creepy Old Guy Lyrics


"Creepy Old Guy" is a song performed by Sophia Anne Caruso (Lydia), Kerry Butler (Barbara), Leslie Kritzer (Delia), Adam Dannheisser (Charles), Rob McClure (Adam) and Alex Brightman (Betelgeuse) from the musical Beetlejuice.

LYDIA:
Way back when
I was just ten
Simple and sweet
Everywhere
Fellas would stare
Out on the street
And I felt used
Kinda confused
I would refuse to look in their eyes
But now I really love creepy old guys!

ALL:
We all do!

BARBARA:
Gum disease

DELIA:
Skin like grilled cheese

LYDIA:
Saggy old asses!

DELIA: (spoken)
Saggy old asses!

LYDIA:
It’s cute and vile-

DELIA & BARBARA:
Hey baby, smile!

LYDIA:
To each girl that passes!

DELIA:
(wolf-whistling)

LYDIA:
They make me blush!

BARBARA:
Can’t get enough!

LYDIA:
Now one of ‘em loves me, wants to be mine!

BARBARA AND DELIA:
That’s right!

LYDIA:
Marrying my own creepy old guy!

BETELGEUSE: (spoken)
I’m a creepy old guy!

LYDIA:
My creepy old guy, my creepy old guy
I’m so happy I could cry!

BARBARA & DELIA:
Girls may seem disgusted, but we’re actually just shy!

LYDIA:
My creepy old groom!

BARBARA:
Creepy old groom!

BARBARA & LYDIA:
Play that wedding tune

LYDIA:
Hey folks, step aside!

BETELGEUSE: (spoken)
I am older, but I’m glad I waited!

LYDIA:
'Cuz here comes the bride!
I am marrying my creepy old guy

THE OTHERS:
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy

LYDIA:
My creepy old guy!

THE OTHERS:
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy!

LYDIA:
Fix his hair
Get him prepared
For Armageddon

BARBARA:
Sure, the groom
Crawled out of a tomb-

DELIA:
But hey, hey, it’s a wedding!

LYDIA:
So dim the lights
Pick up some rice
Say something nice!
It’s my day to shine
I'm getting hitched to my creepy old guy!

BETELGEUSE: (spoken)
It's showtime!

BARBARA & DELIA:
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy
She’s marrying a creepy old guy!

CHARLES:
Have you guys seen “Lolita”?
This is just like that, but fine!

THE OTHERS:
Creepy old dude, creepy old dude
Our faith has been renewed
Now love is alive!

LYDIA:
Wave your baby girl goodbye
I am walking down the aisle
I wanna see a tear in every eye as I pass by
I know that on the outside he’s disgusting
And even on the inside, he’s disgusting
But I know that this time, I'm makin' it right

THE OTHERS:
Making it right, making it right!

LYDIA:
With my family by my side

[DANCE BREAK WITH BETELGEUSE AND THE GAME SHOW AUDIENCE OF SKELETONS.]

BETELGEUSE:
O-M-G
Dressed to a "T"
Fancy and formal
I found me a wife
L'chaim! To life!
This is so normal!
I was ignored
But now, I’m adored!
‘Cause I extorted, tortured, and lied
Give it up for my underage bride!

THE OTHERS:
Here comes the bride
Here comes the bride
God be glorified!

ALL:
I can’t believe some cultures think this kind of thing’s alright

LYDIA:
My creepy old guy
My creepy old guy
Doesn’t he deserve a chance at life?

BETELGEUSE:
Oh yeah, that’s right!

OTHERS:
Yeah, that's right!

LYDIA:
Let’s make him alive!
I am marrying my creepy old guy!

THE OTHERS:
Guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy!
Guy, guy!

BETLEGEUSE: (spoken)
I have chills!

ALL:
Yeeeeeeeeah!



Other Songs: Beetlejuice the Musical Songs Lyrics
Creepy Old Guy Lyrics from Beetlejuice the Musical