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1950 Broadway
Call Me Madam the Musical - The Hostess With the Mostes' on the Ball Lyrics
The song is written by Irving Berlin.
SALLY:
I was born on a thousand acres of Oklahoma land.
Nothing grew on the thousand acres
For it was gravel and sand.
One day father started digging in a field,
Hoping to find some soil.
He dug and he dug and what do you think?
Oil, oil, oil!
The money rolled in
And I rolled out with a fortune piled so high.
Washington was my destination
And now who am I?
I'm the chosen party giver
For the White House clientele
And they know that I deliver
What it takes to make 'em jell.
And in Washington I'm known by one and all
As the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
They could go to Elsa Maxwell,
When they had an axe to grind.
They could always grind their axe well
At the parties she designed.
Now the hatchet grinders all prefer to call
On the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
I've a great big bar and good caviar,
Yes, the best that can be found
And a large amount in my bank account,
When election time comes 'round.
If you're feeling presidential,
You can make it, yes, indeed.
There are just three things essential,
Let me tell you - all you need
Is an ounce of wisdom and a pound of gall
And the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
Entertaining vodka drinkers
Is a job they give to me .
Making nice guys out of stinkers
Seems to be my cup of tea.
What they really need behind the iron wall
Is the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
There's a book of regulations
As to who sits next to who
But there may be complications,
When the blue blood's not so blue.
So the priestess with the leastes' protocol
Is the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
An ambassador has just reached the shore.
He's a man of many loves,
An important gent from the Orient
To be handled with kid gloves.
He can come and let his hair down,
Have the best time of his life.
Even bring his new affair down,
Introduce her as his wife.
But she mustn't leave her panties in the hall
For the hostess who's the hostess
with the mostes' on the ball.
I've been highly complimented
And I thank you what is more.
You'll be damned well represented
By your new ambassador,
For my one ambition is to make them fall
For the hostess with the mostes' on the ball.
In the handbag that I'll carry
There's a precious little note
To their highnesses from Harry
Introducing me he wrote:
"I'll appreciate a favor large or small
For the hostess with the mostes' on the ball."
There'll be no mistakes,
I've got what it takes
To make friends across the sea.
I'll make being smart an important part
Of my foreign policy.
I'll cement our good relations,
When I give my first affair.
There'll be special invitations
To the Duke and Duchess there.
Who's already written asking them to call?
Not the priestess with the leastes',
But the hostess with the mostes',
With the mostes' on the ball.
Review: Call Me Madam the Musical Lyrics
Call Me Madam the Musical Lyrics
SYNOPSIS
Mrs. Sally Adams
The Hostess With the Mostes' on the Ball
Washington Square Dance
Lichtenburg
Can You Use Any Money Today?
Marrying For Love
The Ocarina
It's a Lovely Day Today
The Best Thing for You (Would Be Me)
Something To Dance About
Once Upon a Time Today
They Like Ike
You're Just in Love
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