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2023 West End
Stephen Sondheim's Old Friends - Everybody Ought to Have a Maid Lyrics
(from A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum)
Everybody ought to have a maid
Everybody ought to have a working girl
Everybody ought to have a lurking girl
To putter around the house
Everybody ought to have a maid,
Everybody ought to have a menial
Consistantly congenial
And quieter than a mouse
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delicious
Tidying up the dishes,
Neat as a pin
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delightful
Sweeping out
Sleeping in
Everybody ought to have a maid
Someone who you hire
When you're short of help
To offer you the sort of help
You never get from a spouse
Fluttering up the stairway
Shuttering up the windows
Cluttering up the bedroom
Buttering up the master
Puttering all around the house
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delicious
Tidying up the dishes
Neat as a pin
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delightful
Sweeping out
Sleeping in
Everybody ought to have a maid
Someone who in fetching you your slipper will
Be winsome as a whipporwill
And graceful as a grouse
Skittering down the hallway
Flittering through the parlor
Tittering in the pantry
Littering up the bedroom
Puttering all around the house
A maid?
A maid
A maid
A maid
Everybody ought to have a maid
Everybody ought to have a serving-girl
A loyal and unswerving girl
To putter around the house
Oh, oh,
Think of her at the dustbin
'Specially when she's just been
Traipsing about
Oh, oh,
Wouldn't she be delightful
Living in,
Giving out
Everybody ought to have a maid
Daintily collecting bits of paper n' strings,
Appealing in her apron strings
Being only in her Blouse
Pattering through the attic
Chattering in the cellar
Clattering in the kitchen
Flattering in the bedroom
Puttering all around the house
The house
The house
The house
A maid?
A maid
A maid
A maid
Everybody ought to have a maid
Someone who's efficient and reliable
Obedient and pliable,
And quieter than a mouse
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be so nimble,
Fiddling with her thimble
Mending her gown
Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delightful
Cleaning up
Leaning down
Everybody ought to have a maid,
Someone who'll be busy as a bumblebee
And even if you grumble, be
As graceful as a grouse
Wriggling in the anteroom
Jiggling in the living room
Giggling in the dining room
Wiggling in the other rooms
Puttering all around the house
The house
The house
The house
Stephen Sondheim's Old Friends Songs Lyrics
Stephen Sondheim's Old Friends
Opening / Side By Side
Introduction
Company
The Little Things You Do Together
You Could Drive a Person Crazy
Live Alone and Like It
Loving You
Getting Married Today
Into the Woods
Agony
I Know Things Now
Hello Little Girl
Children Will Listen
Send In the Clowns
The Ballad of Sweeney Todd
The Worst Pies in London
My Friends
Pretty Women
A Little Priest
The Ladies Who Lunch
Sunday
Tonight Quintet
Broadway Baby
Everybody Ought to Have a Maid
You Gotta Get a Gimmick
Waiting for the Girls Upstairs
I'm Still Here
Could I Leave You?
Everything's Coming Up Roses
The Boy From
Losing My Mind
Not a Day Goes By
Being Alive
Old Friends
Side By Side By Side
Our Time
Love is in the Air
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