A Gentleman's Guide - You're a D'Ysquith Lyrics

Broadway production (2013)
A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder the Musical - You're a D'Ysquith Lyrics

MISS SHINGLE:
Have you heard of the D'Ysquith family?

MONTY:
The D'Ysquiths? Why, yes, of course.
Hasn't everyone?

MISS SHINGLE:
Then you've heard of Highhurst Castle.

MONTY:
Of course.

MISS SHINGLE:
You're aware, then, of their position,
Their vast wealth and influence?

MONTY:
Yes, yes. What's it got to do with me?

MISS SHINGLE:
You're a D'Ysquith

MONTY:
What?

MISS SHINGLE:
You're a D'Ysquith

MONTY:
No.

MISS SHINGLE:
Ha ha, oh.

The D'Ysquith blood is flowing through you

MONTY:
Me, a D'Ysquith?

MISS SHINGLE:
A genuine bona fide D'Ysquith

MONTY:
Rubbish.

MISS SHINGLE:
Of course, of course
Ya don't believe me, do you?

MONTY:
You must be mad.

MISS SHINGLE:
Very well, then.
If your mother was not a D'Ysquith,
What was her maiden name?

MONTY:
She always insisted that the only name
that mattered (whispered) was my fathers.

MISS SHINGLE:
Your mother
Lived like a princess in every way
A daughter of Lord Maximillian
Till she met your father one fateful day
She knew it was love - and yet

The family did fear she'd been led astray
By a climbing, conniving Castilian
"Oh let him go
Or else you'll know
A life you will live to regret"

This was no idle threat

"You're a D'Ysquith
A perfectly breedable D'Ysquith
And a D'Ysquith does her duty
Don't forget"

There was nothing your mother could say
She eloped with your father the very next day

MONTY:
So she was... disinherited?

MISS SHINGLE:
In a word. Yes. Despicable, the lot of them.

MONTY:
How awful.

MISS SHINGLE:
Your mother
Made me promise I'd never tell
But now she is no longer living
She wanted to spare you her private hell
But I think you deserve to know

Take this knowledge and use it well
The family may yet be forgiven

This will guarantee
You've a right to be
On the family tree
And it seems to be
Indisputably
Head to toe

You're a D'Ysquith
A D-apostrophe-Y-squith
A-there can be
No other way to view it
Montague, you're a D'Ysquith

MONTY:
I'm all of a sudden a D'Ysquith

MISS SHINGLE:
Yes!
And it's time
That everybody knew it

A-you are the son of the daughter
Of the grandson
Of the nephew
Of the fat cat of all Highhurst, Wooten

MONTY:
I am the son of the daughter
Of the...

BOTH:
The grandson (MONTY: Oh, sorry.)
Of the nephew
Of the second Earl of Highhurst

MONTY:
The thought occurred:
Why should I believe a woman who might very well be insane?
And yet, there seems to be an air of authenticity to this document.

I'm a D'Ysquith (MISS SHINGLE: You're a D'Ysquith)
It would seem I'm a D'Ysquith

MISS SHINGLE:
You're a D'Ysquith

Montague
I picture you
At Highhurst

MONTY:
Yesterday, I was Monty Navarro

MISS SHINGLE:
You could be it all tomorrow

MONTY:
And Highhurst could be My-hurst

I'm a D'Ysquith

MISS SHINGLE:
You're a D'Ysquith

BOTH:
A D'Ysquith
A D'Ysquith
A D'Y... squith

[Thanks to Jemima for lyrics]

A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder the Musical Lyrics

SYNOPSIS
A Warning to the Audience
You're a D'Ysquith
I Don't Know What I'd Do
Foolish to Think
A Warning to Monty
I Don't Understand the Poor
Foolish to Think (Reprise)
Poison in My Pocket
Poor Monty
Better With a Man
Inside Out
Lady Hyacinth Abroad
The Last One You'd Expect
Why Are All the D'Ysquith's Dying
Sibella
I've Decided to Marry You
Final Warning
Poison in My Pocket (Reprise)
Looking Down the Barrel of a Gun
Stop! Wait! What?!
That Horrible Woman
Finale